You call in sick the day after receiving a long-awaited career-boosting promotion so you can play Oktoberfest in your man cave?

You know, I read that if you mix mugwort with sage, you've got quite the vampire repellant, wards off even the most resilient pest.

For guests you really want at the show, you send them save-the-date cards before sending out the invitations, so they can keep their schedules clear.

But she already said she'd only go so far since they're not together.

(Audience: Armani.) LG: Pardon? (Audience: Armani.) (Laughter) LG: It was after the blindfold.